How to avoid burnout in your business
It’s time to stop wearing the hustle, grind, and 10 coffees a day as a badge of honor. Burning out isn’t sexy. Ruining your hormones isn’t sexy. Having no social life is NOT a sign of success.
It’s a beautiful thing to be a woman. Not only do we have the power to grow a human inside of us, but we are full of feminine energy that is radiant, magnetic and alluring. When you learn to cultivate this in a way that can uplevel your life, business success becomes a breeze and burnout is something of the past.
The old me thought that the harder I worked, the less I enjoyed my life and the later I stayed up the more successful I would be. In reality, I was longing for validation from my dad (hello daddy issue). I had a perception that I needed to be “successful” in order for dad to love me. This was obviously wrong, but if as children we perceive things incorrectly, this becomes a story that we continue to live out into adulthood.
I thought pulling my laptop out in cabs, being stressed all the time, and saying “I’m so busy” was a sign that I was crushing it. The more sleep deprived I was, the better I was as a person.
Well, that didn’t work well for me.
So, when I finally slowed down after a horrible ski accident that left me with 3 surgeries, 4 plates, 11 screws, and phantom pain, my whole life changed. I dove into all this feminine energy stuff and now I no longer wear “busy” as a badge of honor, instead, I honor my feminine desires.
The feminine craves love and connection as our first priority in life. And before you jump the gun and say ‘oh that’s just not me’ — I would have said that 3 years ago too… I’m talking to your feminine core. I get that you love crushing it — me too. The truth is, the vast majority of women have a feminine core.
What this means, is that at the end of the day nothing in the world feels as good as letting go, being ‘taken’ by the masculine and releasing control knowing that someone else is taking the lead. So when we keep fighting this core desire of ours because society says that the more you push the more you succeed, we burn out.
The feminine energy is about receptivity. Letting go, flowing and doing things with ease. We magnetize what we want and we are radiant with love, passion, and creativity. The masculine energy is about doing, pushing, striving, direction, focus, and discipline. So when so many of us are living from a place of constant masculine energy, it causes burnout because most of us are just not made for the constant hustle.
Then from a biological standpoint (and what I’m about to say is controversial but I need to say it) women just cannot handle the same amount of stress as a man. We have a cycle where our hormones fluctuate and this affects our stamina, how much energy we can put ‘out’ vs what we need to bring ‘in’ and our nervous systems are more sensitive.
A big pile of stress can completely wreak havoc on our hormones making us lose our libido, become moody, bloated, have skin breakouts, heavy periods, horrible cramps and more. If you have a cycle you know what I mean.
And with a pandemic affecting all of our lives at the moment, many of us are blissfully unaware of the subconscious stress that is now on our bodies. I’m seeing it in my clients and myself. The stress of the unknown, decision fatigue, homesickness, being away from loved ones, fear of the future and not having the normal amount of social interactions for our nervous systems to feel ‘safe’. Plus, throw in the added stress of homeschooling, having your partner around you all the time (NO one signed up for a 24/7 partner when you started dating or even when you got married) and yet here we are. Trying to juggle the new normal, feeling subconsciously stressed and not having the usual break from work life and home life.
It’s a lot.
As a result, we are seeing a new type of burnout where it’s not caused by going to the office too much, but rather the collection of too many little stressors that we weren’t hugely aware of pre-pandemic.
While there is no simple answer to completely avoiding burnout, the one that will change your life, as a woman with a feminine core, is to actually tap back into her feminine. Soften, surrender, let go. Let your partner take the lead, invite him/her to take the lead. Start dancing in the morning, don’t push yourself in your workouts. Listen to your body and tap back into pleasure.
Ask yourself…what does my body need right now? Really ask her. What does she say? Okay, do that.
As women, we are becoming empowered as ever, which is amazing and I’m here for it. But, my concern is that we are forgetting our feminine core wants to let go. She (our feminine core) doesn’t want to push all the time. She wants to be looked after, cherished, and loved. I have a full masterclass on all of this in The Female Hustlers amazing new initiative, “The Masterclass Membership.”
Do something that breaks up your workday from your home life. Tap back into pleasure and get into your feminine after being at your laptop all day. Put on some sexy music, change your clothes, take your hair out, go make out with your partner.
And I want to also preface, it’s not easy to get into our feminine for a lot of us. It’s not just about ‘looking pretty’ it’s about your energy. It’s about letting go of the masculine shell that so many women have around us. The shell that keeps us safe, stops us from getting hurt, and allows us to keep pushing. So many of us women create this when we are little girls because we didn’t get our emotional needs met and as a result, we needed to do something to keep us safe. And then we don’t let it go. We keep it up because we get a false sense of happiness and safety.
But honestly, when you come home at night and no one is there — does that feel nourishing to your soul? I’m guessing not — that’s because the feminine craves connection and love. And yet so many of us are living out another life and another reality that the success of external things makes us think we are happy. It looks good on paper, it makes us look empowered. But what if you also accept that letting go, surrendering, and being receptive is also empowering? I now do.
If you are a woman, who is a CEO, running her own show, or a stay at home mum, you need to get into The Masterclass Membership. This is the lowest cost offering that I have at the moment, and it’s SUCH a vibe. It was professionally filmed at The Shard in London, and it’s nothing short of a life-changing class.
Monica Yates is a trauma healer, feminine/masculine embodiment coach and period whisperer. Monica is also the podcast host of Feminine As F*ck, editor of UNEDITED magazine and an influencer. At the age of only 25, she has built a name for herself as an expert within this realm, as well as a million dollar company. Her mission is to help women clear trauma so they can step into their magnetic feminine energy, as well as help men feel ecstasy and intimacy in the bedroom.
